The Complete Guide to Female Horniness

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According to the New York Times, 2019 was the year that women began openly asserting their horniness for the first time. From Jennifer Lopez telling GQ that many things “make me horny,” to the Cut devoting an entire week to summer horniness, female desire was thrust into the limelight and became, well, inescapable.

If female horniness has you mystified, you’ve come to the perfect place! In this guide, you’ll learn everything you need to know about what makes women horny, how it feels, and why so many women are using such a crass and juvenile term to assert their sexuality.

Female horniness is one of society’s last great taboos and my goal for this guide is to give you a complete understanding of what female horniness is, how women experience it, and what, specifically, induces horniness in women. Stick around and I’ll show you how to press all the right buttons with the special woman in your life and make her so horny that she’ll become sexually obsessed with you!

So, if you’re ready to…

  • Learn exactly what female horniness is,
  • Understand the specific things that make women horny,
  • Discover techniques that will make your woman crazy aroused

Then keep reading, because you’re about to learn all that and more today on Love Nest!

But before you begin, a quick warning:

Once you’ve learned the secrets of female horniness, you’ll feel as though you have sexual superpowers as you’ll be able to get your wife or girlfriend aroused to the point where she may become obsessed with you! You’ll be the only one who can give her the intense arousal that she REALLY craves, so don’t be surprised if she starts begging you for sex!

You have been warned!

What is female horniness?

Unlike glitter bombs and vape stores, female arousal hasn’t just burst onto the scene out of nowhere; it has always existed. What has changed, however, is the way that women are using a decidedly masculine term – “horny” – to describe their levels of desire.

The etymology of the word “horny” lies in the unsubtle similarities between hard, shaft-shaped  animal horns and, as The New York Times Magazine’s William Safire noted, the “male’s erect sex organ.” Long the preserve of crass teenage boys, ‘horny’ is an ugly, inelegant and, to most people, a gross and disgusting word often associated with teen sex comedies such as American Pie and its ilk.

But women reclaiming the term has given the word ‘horny’ a renaissance and a social acceptableness that would have been unthinkable just five short years ago. Undoing hundreds of years of linguistic convention, it’s now become palatable to apply the term to everything from grief to chicken parm. Horny may never have applied to women in the first place, but they’ve taken to using it with force and there’s no looking back.

Being horny is all about women having sex on their own terms and openly stating what they like and what they want. But, as Teen Vogue explained, determining what horny is and how to spot it is easier said than done. By beginning to express their horniness, women aren’t simply asserting their desire; the rise in the use of the term marks a watershed moment where women are transitioning from merely sexual objects to sexual subjects.

Why have women reclaimed the word ‘horny’?

If you’re mystified as to why so many young women are choosing to use a traditionally masculine word to describe their sexual desire, you aren’t alone. The rise in its use over the past couple of years has been nothing short of phenomenal, leading the New York Times to declare 2019 the year that ‘women got horny’. So what, exactly, provoked this seismic shift?

The expression of female horniness has its roots in feminism’s third wave during the mid-1990s during which time writers like Annie Sprinkle started openly discussing female sexual desire. Madonna’s cultural masterpieces, her album Erotica, and her nude-filled coffee table book Sex, were lambasted by critics for being “beyond the pale”, yet ultimately helped fuel a profound societal shift. Women increasingly felt empowered to state their sexual preferences openly, without fear of judgement. to the point where, in the 2000s, an episode of “Sex and the City” featuring vibrator shopping felt completely normal.

The current trend of linking horniness to everything from turtlenecks to Star Wars is perhaps best viewed as an overreaction to a trend that’s been decades in the making. Associating the term with things like nail polish color and right-wing conspiracy theories is an indication of how comfortable women feel expressing their sexual desire on their own terms. The fact that female genitalia remains, for the most part, hidden, no longer acts as a barrier for women who wish to use the term ‘horny’ to describe how turned on they are.

What does being horny feel like for women?

Female horniness is a way of expressing sexual desire – something that, as Teen Vogue pointed out, most teenage girls struggle to even recognize. Given the numbers of young women choosing to use such a traditionally male term like ‘horny’ to describe how turned on they are, it’s little wonder that many men are curious about what being horny feels like for women.

Horniness occurs naturally and can produce a veritable cauldron of feelings and emotions in women. As the Cut’s celebration of summer horniness revealed, female sexuality is a rich and varied tapestry, and every woman feels horny in slightly different ways. So here are some physical and emotional signs and signals that can provide an insight into what horniness feels like for women.

Increased stress

Horniness makes women unable to stop fantasizing about being with the person they’re into, whether it’s their beau or that cute barista at their local Starbucks who they can’t quite take their mind off. Quite often, this results in heightened anxiety due to sexual frustration, a combination shown by studies to lead to higher stress levels. Orgasms are one of the best-known cures as they trigger the release of the stress-reducing hormone oxytocin that can help horny women release their pent up sexual desire.

Restlessness

Horniness makes a woman’s mind swim with thoughts of the person they’re thirsty for. They become preoccupied with thoughts of his smell, and how good his lips will feel when locked around theirs. These powerful fantasies result in restlessness and, sometimes, sleeping problems, something that masturbation can definitely help with; orgasms release a flood of the hormone prolactin which helps dampen restlessness.

Tingling

One similarity between the way that men and women experience horniness is the flow of blood to the genitals. Whereas men feel a bulge, women feel a dilation-induced tingling and can definitely take this as a sign that they’re turned on. This usually makes the vagina wetter and more lubricated than usual, due to increased blood flow to the vagina, leaving the woman in no doubt that they’re thirsty for that special someone!

When do women feel horniest?

One of the main reasons for the mystery surrounding female horniness is the seemingly mismatched expectations of sexytime that most couples experience. When one partner is ready to ‘get busy’, the other could care less and seems too busy to be bothered. So what gives?

According to a survey by the sex toy company Lovehoney, most women feel horny at a completely different time to most men. Their poll of over 2,000 adults found that almost 70 percent of women preferred making love after 11 p.m. while the majority of male respondents preferred to strike out before 9 a.m. This mismatch results in plenty of miscommunication for couples and a fair amount of frustration.

The answer to this mystery lies in men’s fluctuating testosterone levels and women’s menstrual cycles. Lovehoney’s survey findings of most men’s preferred sexytime – between 6 a.m. and 9 a.m. coincides with the time of day when men’s testosterone levels are typically at their highest. Women’s testosterone levels also vary during the day, albeit to a lesser extent than men, but the biggest factor is their menstrual cycle. During ovulation, women’s test levels surge, leading to a higher sex drive and an increase in horniness.

What makes women horny?

As we’ve already seen, female horniness is a little harder to identify than male sexual desire and a woman’s menstrual cycle may play a bigger part in her libido than anything she sees, hears, thinks or feels. But what exactly induces female horniness?

In an interview with Shape magazine, Allison Hill, M.D., an ob-gyn at Good Samaritan Hospital in Los Angeles, revealed that most of what makes women feel horny is “psychological.” Unlike men, who are primarily turned on by what they see, women are more likely to feel horny when:

  • They feel confident about themselves and their sexuality,
  • They ditch the guilt associated with sexual desire or how much they want sex,
  • They start foreplay with their partner.

When viewed in this light, it’s easy to see that female horniness has less to do with their partner than with a myriad of seemingly unrelated physical, emotional and psychological factors. In support of this idea, look no further than the Cut’s weeklong celebration of horniness – Totally Soaked – and its surprising finding that every woman is horny is her own, unique way.

Among the many disparate cue and triggers that set women’s loins ablaze were:

  • Hand massages: The route to many girls’ vaginas is through their hands, with many women expressing how horny hand massages make them feel.
  • Coughing: The sound of a guy coughing is a major turn-on for some women, mostly due to the sexualized nature of the sound. Hearing a guy clear his throat is all it takes for some girls to imagine themselves getting hot and heavy!
  • Driving skills: Impressive car handling skills in incremental weather are guaranteed to make some women’s ovaries explode!
  • Sewing: Pins, scissors and tape measures are all the rage, with the sight of a gorgeous man running his fingers down an expertly sewed seam setting many a woman’s soul on fire!
  • Dental visits: The heady combination of latex gloves, plenty of saliva, and a moderate dose of pain make some women go weak at the knees whenever they visit the dentist.
  • Thumbs: A surprising number of women reported being turned on by the sight of some deliciously manly thumbs – think Matthew McConaughey.
  • Painted nails: Plenty of girls go gaga for boys with painted nails. Something about the confidence associated with defying society’s expectations makes guys with chipped, painted nails absolute lady-killers.
  • Lisps and short hair on girls: When it comes to things other girls do, a number of women find lisps a real turn on and a fair number feel their vagina flip whenever they see a woman with short hair.

As you can see, few things are off-limits when it comes to inducing female desire! Every woman is completely unique and what turns them on could vary significantly depending on the time of day, how she’s feeling about herself and what type of mood she’s in. So, what happens when a woman’s feeling flustered and her partner is feeling anything but?

How women deal with horniness in a relationship

As every woman gets turned on in different ways, it’s quite common for some women to feel hornier than their partner and wind up getting cold shouldered when they feel it should be sexytime-o’clock. This is especially common for women with sky-high libidos but can also happen to women whose partners are going through a rough patch or aren’t feeling as into sex as usual. Here are some of the ways that women manage being horny in their relationships.

Self-touching

Some women get so horny that their desperation for sex leads them to start touching themselves! Provided they are within their partners’ peripheral vision, this can be a foolproof way to let them know that she’s horny and in the mood for more!

Masturbation

Masturbation is a great way for horny women to satisfy themselves when their partner isn’t in the mood. If he likes to watch her touch herself, she’ll get a kick out of him watching and one thing may even lead to another!

Sensual massage

Women with very high levels of desire sometimes find that sensual massage does the trick. If your woman gives you a sexy shoulder rub or a sensual foot massage out of the blue, chances are that she’s got something more than massage oil on her mind!

Dressing up

Dressing up in some skimpy lingerie or a sexy outfit is one of the most popular ways that women express horniness without directly asking for sex. Dressing as a naughty maid and cleaning with a feather dusters can work wonders for most girls and leave their guy in little doubt as to what they really want!

Just asking

Female horniness is all about women stating that they are turned on and want sex. While the fear of rejection is likely playing heavily on their mind, making their desire known is the preferred route for many women. Being direct is better than being passive, or lying. There’s always a chance they’ll hear a “No” but most women understand that rejecting sex is different from rejecting the person!

Giving blowjobs

There are few things in life as powerful as the feeling of a woman’s lips around a guy’s dick! Horny women intuitively know that giving their man a blowjob is one of the best ways to get him in the mood for action. This direct way is an extremely popular way for women to express their horniness!

Using sex toys

Extremely horny women sometimes use dildos and vibrators to compensate for their partner’s lower sex drive. The problem? Sex toys are a poor substitute for the real deal. That’s why letting a guy know that they are needed is a sure-fire way to light the touchpaper!

Creating a sex schedule

While sex schedules sound weird and unsexy, they can help horny women manage their libidos by helping them prepare and giving them something to look forward too. If a couple’s sex drives are mismatched to the point where they’re like two ships passing in the night, drawing up a sex schedule can help get things back on track!


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5 ways to make your woman horny

If you’re in a relationship with a woman, you may feel that you’re usually the one who tries to initiate sex. But that doesn’t mean that she isn’t in the mood or doesn’t want sex as much as you do! Slowly but surely, the age-old myth that women don’t want sex as much as guys do is starting to crack.

The idea that women often want sex just as much as men is surprizing to some men. The problem is that being horny is seen as ‘outside’ of the traditional female role. Some women worry that asserting their desire and horniness will mean that she won’t be accepted or appreciated as a female. That’s why in this section, I wanted to suggest five ways you can unlock your woman’s sexual desire – and have her literally do the work for you!

1. Create a non-judgmental atmosphere

One of the best ways of unlocking your woman’s horniness is creating an atmosphere where she doesn’t feel the need to be perfect. When you make her feel safe and able to let go, you’ll find that she’s much more open to surrendering to her sexual desires!

Forget over-the-top romantic gestures and half-baked pie-in-sky-ideas, the trick is planting a ‘seed’ in her mind that leaves her wanting more! Try waking her up with breakfast in bed and sending her short messages during the day to let her know you’re thinking of her and can’t wait to fulfill her desires. This will put her in the right mood and guarantee that she’ll practically jump you when you get home!

2. Kill her stress

Stress is like putting the handbrakes on a woman’s sexual pleasure. If she feels lost under a mountain of stress, she’ll never be able to let go and become horny. Most guys approach this problem as a sequence of challenges waiting to be solved methodically; if their woman is struggling with, say, cooking, they think that ordering in will solve the issue. While this ‘can-do’ spirit doesn’t hurt, it can miss the bigger picture; the relationship has to take priority over the stress.

Killing your woman’s stress will unlock her innermost passion and make her very aroused, very quickly. Whether you help with cleaning the house, discussing her work issues, or running errands, you’re showing her that putting her first and spending some quiet time together is your top priority. By breaking down the obstacles to romance, you’re helping her unleash her desire and make her horny like never before!

3. Make her feel desired

The first law of basic behavioral conditioning holds that being positive about something – no matter how lame it may seem – will encourage repeat behavior. Female horniness is all about women having sex on their own terms and initiating it when they feel like it. Most women are nervous that they’ll be rejected when they initiate sex so you shouldn’t, under any circumstance, make your woman feel anything less than completely desired and highly desirable.

When your woman feels desired, she’ll become extremely horny to the point where you might feel overwhelmed by the amount of attention she starts paying you! Feeling desired is intoxicating for women – they crave it and live for it – and it’s the key to unlocking their horniness.

To make your woman feel truly desired, try flattering her about something that’s important to her, like…

  • Telling her how amazing her new dress looks on her,
  • Complimenting her on her new promotion or a recent project at work that you know she put a lot of effort into,
  • Saying how much you admire the results of her new health kick…

Provided you are honest, sincere and don’t overuse this technique, you’re guaranteed to get a good reaction and help your women express her desire more openly than ever!

By the way, this works even better if you try it in front of her friends! Paying meaningful compliments about how you owe your success to your woman’s winning attitude and how she’s helping you stay on the straight and narrow will make her feel empowered, sexy, appreciated and respected – all of which are necessary prerequisites for unlocking her horniness!

4. Show her how much you appreciate her

Looking at the myriad of things that makes women horny, you’d be forgiving for throwing your hands up in despair and thinking, ‘Where do I start?’. Well, instead of getting caught up with specific things like the feel of a latex glove in her mouth or the way a barista coughs while making her a skinny latte, try reading between the lines. What do these things have in common?

They make her feel genuinely appreciated.

Women love visiting the dentist as much for the heady mixture of pain, saliva, and rubber as they do for the fact that there’s a suave, well-dressed professional who actually listens to them and pays attention to what they say. Likewise, the barista that makes her vagina flip is more than just a gorgeous pair of hands and a throaty cough; he knows her order and is there for a friendly chat at the start of a long day.

That’s why one of the best things you can do to unlock your woman’s horniness is to show genuine appreciation for the things she does for you. A simple ‘thank you’ for making you dinner or helping you fix your resume lets her know that you value what she brings to the table and that you are ready to repay the favor, should the need arise! Showing your woman some genuine appreciation is guaranteed to make her ovaries start screaming at her to make you happy!

5. Make her pleasure your priority

As I explained earlier, female horniness is extremely complex and sometimes only happens after foreplay starts. Most women are quite flexible and will happily engage even if they aren’t completely in the mood. They know that with a little patience, their desire will grow and they’ll become crazy horny! So be generous in bed and make her pleasure your priority to make her hornier than ever!

So…

  • Ask her to share her fantasies with you when you aren’t between the sheets (the pressure will be off, so she’ll feel more able to share what really makes her motor run!).
  • Try her favorite oral sex position that makes her orgasm every time (get my best clit rubbing tips here!)
  • Experiment with new ways to boost her pleasure, such as clit-rubbing, fingering, and sex toys like clit vibrators that are guaranteed to make her purr with pleasure!

By being considerate, you’ll find that making your woman horny becomes insanely simple – making you feel as though you have sexual superpowers!

5 techniques to make your women crazy horny and sexually obsessed with you

If you’ve made it this far through this guide, you’ll have learned that making your girl horny is surprisingly easy. But what if you want more? What if you want her to literally rip your clothes off when you come home? What if you want HER to suggest some of the nasty, dirty things you could try in the bedroom? What if you want her to literally do the work for you?

To get THOSE results, you need to use FIVE specific techniques (all detailed below) that make her crazy-horny like you won’t believe! Using these techniques is like flipping a switch in her brain that lets sexual tension flow through her veins until she’s literally BEGGING YOU for sex! As you’ll be the only one who can truly make her happy, she’ll start pestering you for more, whether you’re just casually dating or have been married for YEARS!

1. Step on her accelerator

In the previous section, I explained how the key to making your girl horny is killing her stress and removing the ‘brakes’ on her sexual tension. But to ramp up her horniness to stratospheric levels, you need to incorporate some of the earlier advice I gave: all women experience horniness differently. There’s literally no one, single technique that will work for all women. Your goal is to find what makes your woman tick – i.e. her accelerator – and step on it HARD!

I can’t tell you specifically what your woman’s accelerator is; it could be one of the techniques in the previous section such as making her feel desired, or showing her appreciation. Or it could be one of the following strategies. My advice is to experiment with several approaches and gauge the results. When you find one that works, keep at it!

2. Show thoughtfulness

If desire and appreciation aren’t your woman’s jam, thoughtfulness could be the golden arrow that makes her horny like you never thought possible! Thoughtfulness isn’t one, single, thing that you do; it’s a ‘mindset’ that helps you convey how much you’re thinking about her and lets her know that she’s always on your mind.

Showing thoughtfulness could be things like…

  • Running errands that free up her time
  • Taking on extra chores around the house such as cooking or cleaning
  • Messaging her or calling her to let her know she’s on your mind

Whichever approach you choose, thoughtfulness is a way of telling her how much she means to you without saying it directly. It’s one of the most powerful techniques imaginable and can help make her hornier than you’ve ever experienced before!

3. Make her feel special

If you want to understand what REALLY makes your woman horny, it’s helpful to remember that it’s not necessarily who you are, or what you do or don’t do, it’s how she feels. What matters most is that she feels special, valued and cared for. This is sometimes known as the ‘Princess Complex’ and explains why women can sometimes seem to value a struggle when a smoother, clearer path is available to them.

To most women, feeling special and desired is the ultimate prize. It’s not necessary to be the best, it’s the thought that counts. If you can generate this feeling in your woman, it’s like putting her arousal levels on steroids; it makes her horny like you can’t even imagine!

So…

  • Try whisking her away on a surprise weekend break,
  • Try showering her with sweet messages during the day that let her know she’s ‘the one’,
  • Try spending time really listening to what she’s saying (practice your listening skills) and making her feel valued.

If you were looking for the one technique that will make your woman hornier than ever, this could be it! You’ll be blown away by how powerful this can be and won’t believe the results.

4. Show your desire through touch

To build mind-blowing levels of horniness in your woman, you need to master the art of touching her in a way that’s more than just sexual. You have to touch her romantically in a way that she’ll never forget. This will help build the key ingredient to female horniness – sexual tension.

The reason why female horniness seems so elusive is that women are socially conditioned to believe that it’s wrong for them to express their sexual desire. It’s considered unladylike and unbecoming, and opens them up to fears of being rejected.

But touching your woman tenderly lets her know that it’s okay for her to share her desires with you. It tells her that she’s in a safe space and there’s no judgment, no matter what she thinks, says, or how she acts.

You can try things like…

  • Guiding her with your hand on her lower back when you’re out in public,
  • Pulling her closer to you when you’re watching a movie or sitting at home on the couch,
  • Letting her rest her head on your shoulder or lap as you sit beside each other,
  • Playfully grabbing her waist or pulling her away from you,

The KEY is not being overtly sexual with your touch; make it about desire, not sex, and let her know that you’ve got her, no matter what.

When you master the art of communicating your desire through touch, you’ll ramp up sexual tension to the point where her horniness becomes ridiculous! You may even be SHOCKED by the things she suggests doing in bed if you take things far enough!

Don’t say I didn’t warn you!

5. Tease her

Women love being touched, desired and adored, but what puts their horniness into overdrive is being teased. Teasing your women with things like flirting and innuendo will send her pulse racing and make her so horny it’s ridiculous. In this section, I’ll show you a range of ways that you can tease your women until she’s a frenzied ball of horny sexual tension that’s just waiting to EXPLODE in the bedroom!

Teasing is incredibly fun when you do it right; the trick is knowing how far you can take things before you cross the line between flirty and ‘out there’. Some of the light-hearted ways to tease your woman include:

  • Using a playful tone and cheeky smile, say: “My mom warned me about women like you,” when she says something a little controversial.
  • If you can tell that she’s put a lot of effort into her appearance, say something like; “Great, now I’m going to have trouble making eye contact with you all evening! Thanks!”
  • If she pays you a compliment, ask her in a flirty way whether everyone from wherever she’s from is that flirty!
  • If you buy a drink for someone you just met, say: “Don’t worry, you don’t owe me anything (wink)!”.

The SECRET to teasing your woman is being super playful – a serious tone won’t cut it and could even make some of these things seem quite rude!

Teasing is a great way to build anticipation because it lets her know everything you have in store for her when you get home! For example, if you aren’t together, you can send her a flirty message that lets her know that you’re thinking of her and what you plan to do with her when you get to see her!

Teasing is also a great way to directly tell her something you want to do with her! When you’re out somewhere, try whispering in her ear all the sexy, naughty, hot things you have in mind. Say it playfully and her imagination will explode with all the possibilities!

When it comes down to it, rejection is one of most women’s biggest fears and the main reason they don’t try to initiate sex more often (even though it’s quite rare for a woman’s advances to be rebuffed!). By teasing her playfully, you’re letting her know that she’s in a safe space and is free to just let go of her inhibitions without judgment. You’ll be AMAZED at where this technique can lead!

Conclusion

If you started reading this guide to learn more about what makes women horny, how it feels and why it’s so mysterious, hopefully this guide has answered all of your questions. There’s no disputing that female desire is complex, mystifying and one of society’s last great taboos. By reclaiming the word ‘horny’, more women than ever are learning how to enjoy having sex on their own terms and gaining confidence in expressing their desires, in and out of the bedroom!

When you unlock the mysteries of female horniness, you’ll have the ability to tap into the things that make your woman tick and be able to increase her happiness, improve her satisfaction and boost her overall emotional wellbeing! Once the word ‘horny’ stops sounding like an ugly, crass word, you’ll learn that it perfectly describes female desire in ways you never thought possible!

While this guide may seem comprehensive, I’ve only scratched the surface of female horniness and there’s plenty left for you to discover. So whether your heart is set on discovering new ways to pique your woman’s arousal levels, or you are excited about helping your girl experience mind-blowing levels of horniness that turn her into a freak in the bedroom, there’s nothing to stop you!

If you have any questions or comments, feel free to sound off in the comments section below and I’ll do my best to get back to you!

Have fun!

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